adoption option: help wanted

so far, the trickiest part of adoption has been that we don’t know when the baby will actually arrive. we can see it coming in the distance, but we have no idea when it will get here. more on that later, but for now we need your help! because we don’t know exactly when the baby will arrive, or what the gender will be, we are having trouble preparing…i don’t know when to start buying things…so far i have yet to buy one single baby item..i have a small fear of having a nursery totally ready and then it sitting empty for a long time…..but i have decided that i at least need to start doing some research, so when our home study is complete i can start more seriously considering making purchases.

just so you know, it is 100% possible to lose yourself in “gender neutral nursery” on pinterest for the better part of one whole day. i currently find myself elbow-deep in nursery colors, cribs, diaper bags, moby wraps, parenting books, and hair care websites…..and i’m starting to LOSE MY FREAKING MIND! i have fallen so deep down the rabbit hole, alice, that i can’t seem to get back to reality! so here’s where i need you: (insert weak sob, here)  “heeeeelp……”

what do you guys recommend? what do i need? and what do i need right away? what can wait? what will i regret having and not having? best strollers? car seats? diaper bags? any hair care products i will need right away for african american baby hair? is that a thing?…how about good reads? baby wise? pacifiers? cribs? crib mats? monitors? any books, items, etc we should know/need as adoptive first time parents? i mean really, the list goes on, but i find myself getting overwhelmed so i’m gonna stop…..

thank you for helping me narrow down the, apparently endless, array of options. whoever has the corner on this, “everything you need for baby,” market is a freaking genius!

this is a little more dramatic than i actually feel, but i thought it was funny!  (courtesy of pinterest)

this is a little more dramatic than i actually feel, but i thought it was funny!
(courtesy of pinterest)



  1. Amanda Tracy says

    All you will HAVE to have are diapers, wipes, some nb or 0-3 month clothes, a car seat and formula! Pacifiers are probably a good thing to! I like having a bassinet in my room and a pack and play on the other level of the house. But some find one or the other not necessary. I really like the aden and anais swaddlers. A book I usually recommend to read is happiest baby on the block. 5 ‘s are good stuff. :) Baby wise is good but a little extreme on the schedule aspect but there are good points in it. You will be an awesome mom! Just keep breathing!!

  2. Dan Ferguson says

    Hey Leah! I don’t have a ton of advice, but here’s what I can scrape together while I procrastinate at work:)

    Stroller – Bob, single. You’ll need an infant attachment, but it’s so much better as a stroller than the ones that are more exclusively for infants.

    Watch: Happiest Baby on the Block. This saved us during our delirious, sleep deprived, I’m-going-to-throw-this-baby-through-a-wall-if-it-doesn’t-stop-crying (not seriously, but kinda) phase. It’s just a video that gives 5 techniques for getting a baby to sleep.

    That’s all I’ve got.

    Good luck!

    • says

      Dan! thank you so much! i am going to watch that video tonight! i told paul we should have ‘movie night’ so i’ll just add that to the mix! :) “getting baby to sleep” advice will, i am pretty positive, be the best advice we get.

  3. Leah Berg says

    Amanda Tracythank you so much! i will look into all of this…right now…lets be honest :) another friend also recommended “the happiest baby on the block” so that seems like a winner! and tell Tyler T Tracy we will check that stroller out! :)

  4. Amanda Tracy says

    oh my… I am going to be “that annoying mom” but you asked!! I would also say make sure your car seat has the button front adjustable straps and not the claw tooth in the back adjusting straps. I see a lot of parents struggle with those going home from the hospital!

  5. Grete Stevens Tiemeier says

    Stop by some day. I have a book you can borrow. We did extensive research for best products (esp car seats) and this was a lifesaver. Diapers, wipes, car seat, and onsies are all you need at first. Let people shower you after the baby/babies come! Plus you have a lot of neighbors who can lend you stuff until you have a chance to get your own :)

    • says

      You are amazing! Hashtag: best neighbors ever! :) get ready for me to banging down your door when the time comes! haha!! :) thanks grete!!

  6. Kristen Larson says

    Do not buy baby skinny jeans. Worst most impractical invention ever. Side question – will you be a SAHM?

    • says

      Hahahah totally! My kids will dress just like their mom: sweatpants every day! Do they make baby yoga pants?! And yes, the plan is for me to stay home. As long as I don’t make us broke buying all this baby stuff now :)

  7. Tyler T Tracy says

    Bedside touch lamp and jeep stroller are a must. The dinky plastic wheeled strollers are a pain. The rubber wheeled strollers can go over any terrain. Bedside touch lamp saves looking for a switch. A loving hard working resilient wife is a must as well…I have that luckily.

  8. says

    Hi Leah!! Here are some of my favs:
    -Bob Revolution stroller (the one with the swivel front option–AWESOME–we take it all over the hills and woods out here).
    -swaddle blankets (I think they are called Adis and Annis or something like that)
    -we just had our third kid but just finally got a diaper genie–love it. It doesn’t eliminate the smell completely but it is WAY better than the diaper pail i used before
    -we LOVE and have used for all 3 kids a vibrator chair thing that sits at an angle so you can put newborns in it up to bigger babies. We rarely use the vibrator part of it but not sure what it’s called :)

    Those are items that aren’t necessary by any means but that we love :) So not sure if that is helpful or not!! :)


  9. Terinne Berg says

    Leah, I have a bassinet that I used for both Kyle and Paul. It’s been passed down through the family. My mom used it for the 4 of us. You are welcome to it. Take a look next time you are in Fargo. It will work for about a month…depending on how big the baby is and how fast he/she grows of course…

  10. Terinne Berg says

    Also, summer is a great time to find misc. baby items at garage sales. We can start a list of “keep an eye out for” type items.

  11. Sarah C. Johnson says

    Hey Leah! So excited for guys! I can’t remember if you guys are doing international or domestic? International you tend to have more warning and time to prepare. Domestic can be very quick. Either way though I am sure you will get a baby shower (all the adoptions I have witnessed received one). I would recommend taking a friend with you who already has kids to Buybuybaby. They provide a list of suggested items but she can help you register for what you really need and weed out the overkill stuff. That way people have ideas of what to get you and how to help. Also the book Baby 411 I think it was called was great for deciding on what big ticket items to register for.

    • says

      Thank you Sarah! We are adopting domestically, so that can be more rushed! trying to stay ahead of something and you don’t know where it is! :) so excited for you guys and the new babe!! you are so adorably pregnant! :) praying for a safe and smooth delivery for you guys. and Thank you for the tips! I will be checking those out today!

  12. Missy says

    I agree with the comment that all you will HAVE to have when the baby arrives is a car seat, diapers, wipes, some onesies, formula, bottles and a crib/bassinet. Here are my recommendations for things to put on your registry for others to be able to shower you with love after the baby arrives. Watch out, I’m about to be that annoying/opinionated mom :)

    For the baby:
    1. Swaddle blankets (my favorite were Aden & Anais; I had about 8 of them and Teagan still uses them as her blankies); Velcro swaddle blankets are also nice during the newborn stage
    2. Mitten cuff onesies (for the newborn stage so they don’t scratch themselves)
    3. Pacifiers (I liked the newborn and MAM pacifiers)
    4. Diaper genie
    5. A sound machine (babies love white noise. We also downloaded a white noise app that would help her sleep when we are out and about).
    6. A bouncer & swing (any little thing to free up your hands!)
    7. High chair (Ikea sells the BEST high chair for like $19.99. It is so easy to clean and comes apart if you’re traveling)

    For you:
    1. A cute/durable diaper bag with lots of pockets (I didn’t carry a purse for about 2 years!). I have a dwell bag because a friend gave it to me but many friends love ju-ju-be. I also got a simple black diaper backpack for the husband.
    2. A good stroller (I have the BOB revolution and love it) & carseat (we had the Chicco Keyfit)
    3. Some sort of baby carrier. I had the Ergo and liked it. A lot of my friends have really liked the Moby Wrap.
    4. DVD you should watch: Happiest Baby on the Block

    Ok, I’ll stop there. Sorry for all the info. We are excited for you guys and praying for a smooth adoption process!


    • says

      Missy! you are amazing! thank you! i am just going to start printing all of these off and taking them with me to the store! you guys are the best! You are never annoying! please! i love it! keep it coming! and expect panicked emails from me as the time gets closer! haha! :)

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